Thursday, May 31, 2012

Psalm 107:19-21 Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress; he sent out his word and healed them, and delivered them from destruction. Let them thank the Lord for his steadfast love, for his wonderful works to humankind.

I'm writing this down not to document this event, because who wants to remember a week like this past one, but more as therapy for myself so that I can finally let go and let God have back control to take care of my family.  

I will forever call this past week, 'this is my nightmare'.  Although this quote comes from the hilarious movie 'I Love You, Man', a saying that Em and I quote often, I was not laughing while I kept repeating this to myself; reveling in the irony of it all.  I will never take my children, or anything else for that matter, for granted ever again.  It's hard to be the same person after watching your baby stop breathing and being taken away in an adult size gurney.  That mental snapshot will be burned in my retinas forever.  And to think, that was only the start of this never-ending nightmare.

We got to the hospital after what seemed like an hour long ride, only for them to diagnose my sweet little five month old with a simple ear infection, and a febrile seizure from his high grade fever.  They released us only three hours after arriving with some oral antibiotic saying that he would be fine.  So we continued on our way to Denver later that day excited to celebrate the marriage of our dear friends.

After arriving in Denver, we received a call from the hospital in Gilbert telling us to get to a hospital ASAP to get more tests done on Kace because his blood culture came back positive for bacteria.  We left Kingston in a strange place with some close friends, and rushed Kace into the car headed for the nearest hospital.  Because I have my medical degree from, I, of course, immediately look up bacteremia....That was a mistake.  'Sepsis can be treated with antibiotics, particularly if it's caught early, but even then, it can be lethal.'  I read this sentence and immediately put down my smart phone and vowed to not look at it again...not ever. 

We ended up at the Denver Children's Hospital.  Pulling up to the emergency room, I see "#5 Ranked Children's Hospital in the United States"; praise the Lord.  The fantastic doctors calmly told us that they needed to run a gamut of tests, including a CT scan, spinal tap/lumbar puncture, and another blood culture to rule out a brain mass, spinal meningitis, and to rerun the bacterial culture.  None of which would have been a positive diagnosis.  They also looked at his ears---no ear infection.  I held down my rage for the Gilbert hospital, only to keep focused on getting Kace healthy, because I cannot change the past and I needed to invoke change on the future.  

After seven days (72 hours of which without sleep) of IV antibiotics, spiked fevers, uncontrollable crying (by me and Kace), a flight in by my own Mommy (thank you Lord for my dear mother for always being there for me on a moments notice), a still unclear cause of both the seizure and bacteremia, a pretty intense lovers quarrel regarding chapstick, 1000 repetitions of "The Wheels on the Bus", and a break-up with our pediatrician, it seems we are now on the upswing of this whole endeavor.

I now check Kace for a fever about every minute, and probably will continue doing that until he's married and I can ask his wife to do it for me.  I'm still coming down from the entire adrenaline rush of the last seven days, but I feel incredibly lucky to be home with my boys and seemingly on the other side of this whole thing. I thank God everyday for the health of both of my babies and my family.  

Below are some pictures from the weekend...including Kingston as a ring bearer (cutest ring bearer EVER!) He did an amazing job walking down the aisle, he had to be bribed by a sucker of course.  Oh yea, and he fell in love with a little girl named Elena.

 A picture from today...One of the first times that he let me set him down for more than three minutes without crying.

 Kingston with his girlfriend, Elena...Melted my heart.

 The Ring Bearer...

 The Ring Bearer...His shirt was too short, haha...

 Kingston playing outside of the hospital.  Poor little guy had no idea what was going on.  It broke my heart to have to leave him, but all of our friends and family helped make him comfortable.  He definitely was not lacking in attention or love without his mommy or daddy!

 Elmo balloon solves all problems.

 This dinosaur from our friends Lauren and Jon really helped Kace and Kingston feel better.

 Auntie M came to the rescue...

 Poor sick buddy...

 The wagon provided a little entertainment at the hospital...

 His little IV. 

With Auntie Danielle before the week started...


  1. Wow I just read this for the first time. Made me cry all over again. Such a stressful time. Yes....thank you Lord for healing our baby. Love you and you sweet family Kare!

  2. Hey sweet sister <3 somehow I missed this when you wrote it and then thought I'd check your rarely updated blog (wink) tonight and read through it and am crying again at the memory. You are so amazing and strong. How I wish we lived near you all. I miss you all daily. And love you so so much. And Kingston is SERIOUSLY the cutest ring bearer ever. Ever!